There are mechanical reasons for this. Realism=The death of unit control.
Just look at AOE3. The cannons and ships in that game are an absolute disaster to micromanage, entirely because they are realistic. Then look at the classic mango/onager in AOE2 and how engaging it is because of it’s success hinging on micro. If it went how you people want it to go; the onager would have 4 people pushing it and their cute little animations would mean the mango takes forever to shoot, forever to reload, and would be functionally unmicroable and significantly less useful.
It’s bad enough that 4 has confirmed realistic ships with side attacks (meaning micro will be straight up impossible, and that water fights will be decided by unit comps and the occasional glitched pathing only) and units torching buildings/a fire system (massively cutting into siege’s niche and making offense more rewarding (continued burn damage even after your units die) meaning that the already strong offense orient of the series will only grow stronger. Asking for ■■■■ like realism in the siege or animations is pure stupidity that will only make the game worse.
It’s a video GAME. Mechanics are what are important. Stop asking for the game to be worse to appeal to your sensibilities.