You Know You're Ready For AOE DE When

There was an old thread at HeavenGames called “You Know You Play Too Much AOE When…” followed by dozens of things that only an obsessed AOE fan would do.
For Example,

HeavenGames said:

⦁ You see your local town’s center and wait for villies to come out
⦁ You hear about overpopulation in the third world and wonder why they
don’t build more houses…
⦁ Then realize that the problem might be that they have reached their
population limit…
⦁ You ask the preacher at your church how much range and hitpoints his cool tower has
⦁ You explain in a history lesson that early man could only have taken 10 minutes to reach the >Bronze Age.
⦁ You hit period instead of tab to find idle villagers on other RTS games and press CTRL+F12 to >print screen instead of Print Screen.
⦁ You swear that the Sumerians and Assyrians built Pyramiads.
(There were a couple others too-- The 2008 one is my favorite, and there was another in 2013 )

At this point, we’re all waiting [im]patiently for AOE DE. Even though we don’t even have a release date, let’s make a list of

You Know You're Ready For Age Of Empires Definitive Edition When..

  • You’ve dusted off your Pause|Break key
  • You wear blue whenever you’re alone
  • You’re dual-booting Windows 10 and Windows 98. We all know which one is superior.
  • Two minutes of trailer music has been stuck in your head for two months
  • You thank the local priest for not changing the “Wololo”
  • You’re reading this on an HD CRT monitor
  • the desktop background is set to a screenshot of the MSN Gaming Zone
  • You’ve been telling your Discord friends to get AIM accounts
  • You want ForgottenEmpires to set you as “Ally” so that you can see what they’ve built
  • You shout “B. F. !” when you see people loitering
  • If there are enough people, you shout “B. O. !” instead
  • You’re surprised that 140k Insiders hasn’t broken the forums’ population limit
  • You’ve Finally started walking in all 16 directions instead of just eight

Reply in this thread to keep the list going:

You keep searching for AoE DE news even though you’ve read it all.

You made a brand new youtube channel for the DE

You try to play the Byzantines in AoE2 to get that ancient/classical feel, but it’s just not the same without the Romans

Every new email you get, you think it’s for the beta.

Conversely, every new email you get, you know it’s not for the beta.

You try to blow off some steam by going on Steam to play Age 2 while having a steaming bath.

You examine the trailer frame by frame to glance at the marvellous details.

You think the Windows Store is awesome.

You think the zooming feature makes you feel you are part of the game itself.

You’re H and C keys are stuck on your keyboard.

You upgrade to a 4K monitor.

You cosplay like a Centurion at work.

You forage berries and bring them to your local town hall.

You visit and AoEH multiple times a day.

You think DE requires your original CD to run.

You design custom scenario’s featuring only hundreds of priests.

You spam WOLOLO in every topic.

You think the beta will start soon.

You’re middle name is Rogan.

You think shouting “dark rain” causes modern day archers to change into trees and walk on water.

You think North Korea uses ballista’s as ICBM launchers.

You think Black Riders originate from Age of Empires.

You play the Deathmatch setting to death.

You played every Age game but still consider the original AoE to be the best.

You know RoR does not stand for Rise of the Rajas.

You accept that females were not present untill the Dark Ages as historical fact.

You still think the world is flat and is isometric.

You think Ensemble Studios still exists.

You assume that the AI cheats.

You think modern day buildings appear from bare foundations after hammering them continuesly.

You over-analize Vietnamese and Chinese expert matches.

You use the instruction bitmap as your wallpaper.

You think there were only giant people during the Stone-Iron Age.

You still play multiplayer via LAN.

You don’t care about gates and formations.

You love Hero Jason’s outfit.

Keep 'em coming people.

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You went to a house to hit it with a sword. When it didn’t catch on fire, you searched for the repairman. Then the enemy brought cheat units and took you to their TC for a while. It was then that you realised that it takes 100’s of years for most buildings to catch on fire, even houses, unless you are a Centurion.

The next day you were caught stabbing a house with a spear while holding some kind of triangle shield.

When it’ll be 70% off in the store.

You think that wearing clothes makes you stronger like loom tech.
You think real trade carts carry gold.
You use every taunt in social media.

When your in Home EC class in school and your asked to make a cake that should look like a cat, but you make it look like a Roman Legionnaire.

When you try to pause AOE videos with F3.

When you think if you hammer the ground long enough, a building will appear

When you swing a sword at someone an completely miss, yet it still does damage to them.

When you try to click on the mini map in RoR videos.

When you continually shoot arrows at nothing because you think there’s an enemy there.

When you think that if you walked into a dark room, everything will reveal itself.

When you help start projects related to Rise of Rome and/or Definitive Edition.

You’ve made a comment in this thread.

Your phone’s lock screen picture is a screenshot of the beta invite.

You are convinced that the solar eclipse this Monday is nothing but a publicity stunt by Microsoft to herald the return of Ensemble Studios.

You know your ready for Age of empires DE when

Your lying on the couch on a Sunday morning a little hung over and can hear the aoe 1 sound tracks in you head.

It’s getting to that time of the month where cash is getting a bit short but you have stashed £30 away incase the game is released.

  • You think you used the flare icon to mark the gamescon event at your Facebook calendar.
  • Going to bed and falling asleep while playing AOE ROR OST.

You hands automatically start with fingers on H and C on the keyboard regardless of what game or document you are typing.

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You have reinstalled AOE and AOE II: HD games.

12pm pdt there is a major announcement event so stay tuned

I doubt there is enough “major announcement” will be able to satisfy unless there is major waves of beta invites.

Major Announcement = overhyping.

I’m sitting here like everyone else F5ing their email client.